Wednesday, April 27, 2011

joy in the journey

Almost 3 years ago, I graduated from high school. High school was a blast for me! Loved every minute of it! Senior year, I was the class president and student government was amazing, but it stressed me out beyond belief. Especially at the end of the year when I found myself coming home from Hawaii and finishing graduation credits, senior ball and graduation plans. Hectic does not begin to describe my life! I stopped focusing on friends and how much fun I was having and what a great experience I'd had, and bought into everybody else's mindset of "OH MY GOSH I CAN NOT WAIT TO BE DONE WITH HIGH SCHOOL!" After giving my speech, reading names, walking and tossing our caps I turned to our principal and said " I am so happy to finally be out of here." That was a lie. But I felt like I should have been because that's how everybody else felt.
3 months after that great day, I found myself packing up my clothes, book, DVD's, bedding, pictures, hopes and dreams and ambitions and moving 300 miles away from the town, people and experiences that I knew and loved. I told everyone that I was ready for change and adventure! I was the only way that had left home after college and I was learning firsthand and alone just what it meant to grow up. I spent August-Novemember depressed and lonely and sleeping more in a week than I did in a month during high school. I regretted wishing my time away.

To make a long and painful story short, things finally changed right before Thanksgiving break and I vowed to never let myself go back to those 4 awful months. It's a part of who I am to find laughter and good in almost everything that comes my way. In 10th grade I remember lashing out at a teacher..."Why do we never get to just enjoy the stage that we're in?!" In elementary we are slowly shorted on our recess time to get ready for junior high where we don't have any. In junior high we get ready for high school with taking more notes and teachers not going as slow. In high school we are not allowed to turn things in late to get ready for college days where professors don't care about our sob stories. In college we are pushed continually to get ready for "real life" bosses that "can't wait to give us a reality check that life isn't just fun and games."

This has always bothered me and I don't buy it anymore. It makes me sad to see people constantly wishing their time away in so many aspects because it's hard or they can't wait to get on to something better. Why? We were so ready to get out of high school on to college only to find ourselves (or some of us at least) stuck with rent and tuition and having to cook for ourselves and heavy workloads and awful deadlines. We want to get out of college and on to the real world, even though I'm pretty sure many people wish they could return to the careless ways of college-fun-days. Rushing to get married? Wanting babies to grow up only to find the classic question of "Where did time go" as they get married or leave on missions.

Stop counting the days, and start making the days count! ENJOY THE NOW! I have had a beyond crazy semester and am incredibly ready for finals to be over with. But I have loved every step of the way. I loved the days that we sat in Rauj (aka Dr. Blomquist) class making a tally for how many times he swore that lecture..I looked forward to dark room days where we placed bets on who's film wouldn't turn out and pizza runs on our 3 hour lecture days..I did not get kicked out of the library. Not even once..We went to dances...Roadtrips 3 hours away with dad for a 10 point paper..I almost peed my pants in math when Josh fell asleep and bounced his head off his desk..I made friends with strangers in my classes..I almost cried when I open my history midterm and realized I had no idea what anything was on the test, but felt better that I wasn't the one that got up and left without even trying..I laughed as we burned analytical reviews on Nathan's stove while we made brownies..I spent over 200 bucks on photo supplies and wish I'd spent more...I stayed in lab for 7 hours to walk outside and find myself in a snow ball fight..

Graduation is an amazing accomplishment and should never be thought of as anything less but why rush it? You'll NEVER ever ever get to go back to this stage of life so enjoy for it now and soak up all of it that you can. Live. with. no. regrets.

Here's to Spring 2011 semester!

it was a good one

Monday, April 25, 2011

this week

April 21st-May 1st is going to be a glorious time! For starters, I am getting my hair done tomorrow for the first time since January. Yes, that would be 4 months! New record? I think yes. My nails will finally be painted. MY FINALS WILL BE DONE! My hand will no longer smell like fixer or developer. I am going to enjoy the room and bathroom that I spent 3 hours cleaning (probably even take a bath with the jets on). I am getting a schedule change at work. I am planning a mini roadtrip. I am making my FUN "to do" list for the summer. I am going to start reading my choice of books. I am going to burn my past homework. I am going to play tennis with Scott and dinner with Dave. I am going to sleep more than 4 hours a night. I am going to go on a walk. I am going to say goodbye to my new Rockstar Recovery addiction. I am going to start washing my hair more than once a week.
I am going to see this boy :) Jon Hammond is finally returning to Utah tomorrow and I freakin can not wait. I was way excited to go to the airport...until I realized it'd be kinda weird and that I have finals. So tomorrow night it is :) Bring on a roadtrip and Wendy's runs!

This girl has also returned back to Utah! My China buddy and good friend I have missed so much. We probably won't be staying in a trafficking hotel, hopping on any random buses or gagging over "nasty tofu" smells in a market. We likely won't be hauling water up 5 flights of stairs. We definetly won't be singing Mulan songs along the Great Wall of China...but we will definetly be having a blast and doing some serious catch up!

I'm gonna finally write the brother that I miss mucho. Yes I'm a bad sister and haven't writtten him for awhile. In particular, it's probably time he know about the mission plans. Mexico is lucky to have him :)

I remembered this week why I didn't do finals in St. George....holy hell! And no mom, I'm not using it as my typical expression, it literally is hell to have all that stress and lists of what to get done and no personal time whatsoever. But it's such an accomplished feeling. Still not worth it though.

Monday, April 18, 2011


Ted is the Mav man that I see on nearly a daily basis for my drink and chip fix. It's safe to say we're pretty good friends!

Ted: "Oooooh girl! You're getting juice?!"
Me: "(laughing) Yep! It has come that time again."

Ted: "No Mt. Dew at all? Not even a little one?"
Me: "Nope. Just cranberry and apple for me today."
Ted:" did it again didn't you? Too much go and not enough slow? You're getting sick again. I TOLD YOU you need to slow your life down."

Who needs a doctor when you've got a mav man?! Funny that he's right though. The last 2 weeks have been straight up crazy! I worked a LOT and then spent every other waking minute (which definetly out weighed the sleeping minutes) doing homework and various school crap. I poured it on last week, crossing stuff off the to-do list like crazy so I could take my little vaca to St. George. And of course....played ALLLL weekend! So naturally when I woke up today, there was a little man hammering at the inside of my skull behind my eyes, a tennis ball stuck in my throat, my eyelids were glued shut and someone had beat me with a bat while I slept! .....okay maybe not, but that's definetly what it felt like. Once I discovered it was raining, it was pretty near impossible to get out of bed.

Happy Monday? probably not so much this time. But it was definetly worth it:)

Monday, April 11, 2011

to-do and be done

Only Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and 12 hours and:
-Calling Dr. Holmes

-Calling Dr. Marshall

-Email Jonny boy

-Write Taylor

-Meeting with bishop

-3 days of work

-7 hours in photo lab

-4 pictures fully mounted and critiqued

-Math assignment "checked" email

-5 math assignments for the week (not to count catch up)

-Library appeal form

-Cove Fort books

-Mounain Meadow Massacre books

-First (yes first) 10 anatomy/physiology quizes

-Pick up take home test for math

-Plan out bill payments schedule

-Type and print history notes

-History flashcards

-Develope 4 rolls of film and do contact sheets

-1 month (yes month) of laundry

-Clean out car

-Clean bathroom

-Book analytical paper

-Research paper


I'm off to my favorite little San Jorge for the weekend! So here's to a week of complete lockdown and finally finally finally cracking down on a real to do list (because this isn't even everything I have to do by end of semester) and then a few days off to play with friends and defrost in that sunshine! :)

And of course I always go down by myself so I have a good 2 1/2 hours of blasting music, singing at the top of my lungs with the windows down...who says therapy isn't cheap?!

I. Can. Not. Wait.

and in case you didn't hear...I AM going on a mission. So don't judge me when I start sluttin it up as soon as it's warm cause my days of freedom are starting to count down already!