Hebrews=Humbling

Lately I have had an ongoing topic of thought and tonight I finally decided that it was time to write about it a little bit. It's a combination of things that have been going on lately, and ESPECIALLY Jacqui's farewell talk from Sunday [of which she did amazing.]

I read my scriptures tonight for the first time in I don't even know how long. It took me about 15 minutes to even figure out where they were. For some reason I felt like I really needed to read them. Once I found and opened them, I saw a long paper sticking out through the middle, so I figured why not flip it open to that section and see what it was I had marked. The section was Hebrews chapter 11. The very first part of the chapter heading says "By faith we understand the word and work of God..." I instantly understood why I felt promped the way I did.

I ended up marking every time that it says something specific/an example of somebody that demonstrated great faith. I now have a marking at the start of almost every single one of those 40 verses.

You know how sometimes in the scriptures people make the Lord so upset that he either appears to them or speaks to them directly? I'm pretty sure there have been multiple times where I was borderline on His list for that. He had to sit back and give me just a few more days to pull out of things, before He would be forced to come give me a little humbling talk. But He always knows when I will eventually work through whatever trial, hardship or burden has been thrown my way. After reading this chapter, I feel incredibly humbled and a little ridiculous for my "impossible" trials I have had [and definetly complained about] in my life:

If Christ or Heavenly Father ever did decide that I needed a direct talk, I'm pretty sure it would go a little something like this: "So you feel as though you were alone when you first moved to St. George? Perhaps you would rather be hiding in a wilderness completely alone while angry kings or rulers were after you for doing my work? You don't think it was fair to send sickness to your family? Would you prefer that there be a plague that wipes out most of them while you watch them slowly suffer and die, then go on in life alone? You had a hard time with the deaths of those near to you? Would life be easier if you had been the one chosen to be thrown into the lion's den? You've had some struggles with friends? Remember how YOU are the one that chose them and put yourself in bad situations, despite the fact that you knew it was wrong? At least I didn't put you up on a wall to have people throw stones and say harsh things and shoot arrows at you. I think you got the better deal on that one. Would you had rather been a pioneer? Leaving your home and friends and forced to bury loved ones in snowy planes along the way? Have you ever had to offer up your only son as a sacrifice? Have I asked you to build an ark despite the fact that you have no idea what you're doing, people are going to ridicule you and you have no idea why? My dear Chantel....despite what you may think sometimes, I have given you a great life!"

So of course that sounds a little dramatic, but I honestly believe that it is true. I have this picture in a large frame on one of my bookshelf. Brother Brayton gave it to me when I graduated high school and I LOVE it! He wrote me a card about how life can get hard sometimes and with all the changes coming up, to not forget that the Savior is always there for me. I guess I forgot to take note on that last part because I have definetly let myself get down in some life's latest challenges. I am the first to admit that sometimes I can be pretty quick to turn away from the Lord when times get tough whether out of bitterness, anger or just feeling the need to try and solve things on my own.

My own definition of faith is that no matter how bad things may get, they will always, always get better! Faith is taking the first step, even when you can't see the rest of the staircase. It is hard and scary but it is SO worth it! I have to remind myself a lot, but I'm actually really grateful for the trials and hardships that life has for me, because I am able to realize now that it truly is only to make me better and stronger.

I love this picture because it teaches me a lot about Heavenly Father. It shows that I truly am His daughter. It reminds me that I'm never alone. It is a clear picture of how He is always close by and ready to help me, just as soon as I'll let Him. It shows that when I am close to Him, I am happy. It show how He is protecting. It shows that He is loving and nuturing. He shows He is gentle and compassionate. It shows that He is not only close, but also completely aware of what is going on in my life. I need to keep working on remembering this on a more regulare basis.

If you look at it for awhile and think about what it means to you personally, I think you too will understand why the picture is appropriatly named "I Will Not Fail Thee."


Hope everyone had a great Monday, and happy Tuesday :)