ABC's of growing up

Your little hands wrapped around my finger

And, it's so quiet in the world tonight

Your little eyelids flutter cause you're dreamin

So, I tuck you in

Turn on your favorite night light

To you, everything's funny

You got nothing to regret

I'd give all I had, honey

If you could stay like that

Oh, darling don't you ever grow up

Don't you ever grow up

Just stay this little

Oh, darling don't you ever grow up

Don't you ever grow up

It can stay this simple

I won't let nobody hurt you, won't let no one break your heart

And no one will desert you

Just try to never grow up

Somewhere along the way, life changes. Kez only worries about trying to pull her hair out, what toys she wants to play with and who she wants to chase around the dining room/kitchen that day. Jaxon...well he has it even easier! He pretty much just lays there and makes no type of decision whatsoever. They're in the stage where life is still a fairytale. Nothing can touch them and they have nothing to fear.


Growing up, you learn that life isn't really that way. You learn that people you trust, are going to let you down. You learn that your parents are NOT invincible no matter how hard you try to believe that they are. You ache with your first broken heart. You cry the first [and following] times when you realize what it's like to miss somebody. You get in fights with people you care about. You grow apart from people you used to care about. You get confused when faced with hard decisions. You learn disapointment from your first failure. You blaim new people for things that old people did. You are forced to finally realize what it's like to have somebody be here one day and gone the other. You cry when you realize that suddenly death isn't something that affects only really really old people or great great grandparents. And sometimes, just sometimes, you realize how truly fragile life can...


I can't even tell you what year is was when I really met Becca. I've always just assumed that I've known her my whole life, because I can't remember ever NOT knowing her. Becca was recently engaged and was planning on marrying this lovely guy in February. Becca died yesterday. She was doing things like Christmas shopping, and planning a wedding and getting over a cold and visiting her mom and wishing people happy birthday and finishing her semester and...just like that it was her time to go and she was gone. When I think of Becca, I will think first of her smile! I swear she's always had the same one! She had a very distingushed laugh and she laughed a lot. I remember Becca and Brittney R. were the first people I ever snuck out with and how excited we were once we got out, running down the street to Lex's house. I remember Becca being the first one to wear a bra. I remember Becca being an INCREDIBLE friend that would always stand up for people! Even the time that she chewed out her boyfriend in the middle of a party because he was being rude to Brit. I remember how hard we laughed when we always gave Miss Sparks crap in english. I remember running out to the basketball courts in 5th and 6th grade to make sure we got the court with 2 hoops before the boys did. I remember our gosh awful videos we made for EVERY project we had to do in US History. I remember rolling her down the stairs in a garbage can the night we slept at the school for our basketball sleepover. I remember the excitement of starting Junior High and how we thought we were sooo cool to be able to write a note and "I'll just stick it in your locker!" I remember going to al a carte EVERY morning before 7th grade and buying a white doughnut with sprinkles. I remember making fun of Gibbons and her mole and our intense hatred for Canadians. I remember Becca in my ward and how hard we were always laughing in Young Womens and hot tubing at Julie's house. I remember when I was getting ready to move and I had my first break down at church and even though we had been fighting, she gave me a hug and sat in the bathroom and cried with me for allll of sunday school. I will try not to remember how only a couple weeks ago we were going to meet up for our friends wedding.


I know we lost touch Becca, but you are loved! You were definetly an influential friend in my life and I love you for helping me through a lot of challenges and those awkward awkward years. Like Josh said, I look forward to seeing you again :)